These are a few of my favorite things?
I had tons, literally TONNES to say until I started this blog, and then recognized that other people (people whom I don't know - but still love and appreciate for finding something worth reading here - bang up job ole chaps) will read this. Now, again, as I apparently have been most of my life, find myself indulging in selfishness. And I'm also a chronic bad speller, but that's neither here nor there...
I wanna speak. I wanna scream. I want mad, mad passionate sex, I want to get higher than high.
And the thing is, I can't. The person who introduced me to all that is gone. Hates me. Well, at least his disgusting crusty old lady does. Bleach. Wouldn't touch her with a fifty foot pole, even if someone else was holding it...
Yet somehow in his eyes she's a better catch than me.
Is she? Really?
I want a man. A man's man, who will get the spider out of the bathtub and have a nice chest for me to sleep on. Someone who wants to protect me. Someone who's body fits into mine like we were made for each other...
A man that I can take care of. Make great meals for, have his head in my lap watching TV and just petting him. Someone who will go out with me to see the horses and see what I do that makes me powerful. Someone who kisses just for the sake of kissing.
Apparently this is all too much to ask. I know don't have a bad attitude. But that's what makes it the hardest; Pilbox - I was borne eternally hopeful and light of spirit. I learned this heaviness. And I'm just afraid that if I don't put out the pessimistic that I'll look like a fool.
Does that make sense?
I do hope, but I'm embarrassed for hoping, because maybe I'm not lovable, a desirable woman (THAT CACNNOT BE TRUE) - I'm so at a loss, and so lonely...
S
No comments:
Post a Comment